Nobody knows who Brad Towers is. But many things have been said about him.

They say he once owned a sword so heavy that no orc, elf, or dwarf could lift it. He has never lost a duel. He has a sister he loves so much, he’s named a character in one of his novels after her. He’s traveled to five continents here on Earth, and to several fantasy worlds. He has helped build things that millions of people use every day, and he has commanded large armies and conquered medieval Europe not once, but many times. The only picture we have of him is this:

Three of the sentences above are false. Guess which ones, send Brad an email with your guesses at brad at bradtowers dot com, and receive a free short story if you’re right.

Oh, you wanted the serious version? Go to this page.